Dating...Engaged...Married...Kids....BORING...someone please tell me this isn't my life track! I need more...I need...less! Is single the new taboo? I feel like when I was single it was like a race to become un-single...and for what? I mean, don't get me wrong...I'm happy, but why did I think I couldn't be happy single, I'll even go as far as to say, why would I think I couldn't be happy dating. Who has put these things in our heads to make us feel like single or unmarried isn't the norm, when in fact I can count happy married couples on one hand, but I would need all the hands in the world to count the happy unmarried ones.Is it not cool to not be planning a wedding?
I live my life by planning or looking forward to atleast something...I always need some type of countdown..whether it be to a birthday, or a damn bbq...I'm counting down to something. Has that moved over into my relationships? Did I need a countdown to feel like I was moving forward? Why can't life just stand still? Do you really need to go to the so-called 'next-step'? Have we been socialized into thinking that these are truly the next steps? What if we have this all backwards...think about it...there was Adam...and then there was Eve...now I'm not going biblical on you...but he didn't plot them down as Adam & Eve Smith...you get me?!?!? I know I'm reaching...but just explore...
Can you be happy alone?
It doesn't have to be the creepy alone with no friends and no one of the opposite sex::or same...I won't judge! But do you have to take someone's last name to validate your progression? As I approach marriage, I have explored all these thoughts..and I do simply understand that when you love someone, and you know you want to spend the rest of your life with them..then you usually just get married...BUT...I feel like the older I get..the more I'd rather just let it be. No hoopla...no formalities...just love. No what's next, or what do we do now...just love.
didn't know ma could write! :) just thought i'd check out your blog (nice!) and spend my two cents..as a recent "married" folk, i've seen the race to the altar more often than not, especially now with a lot of mutual friends getting engaged, having kids, etc.--the whole concept of marriage gets lost on those busy tryin to keep up. i may be the only pragmatic girl in this tine of romantic fools, but to me if i know i want to be with someone the rest of my life, then it becomes a practical matter: shared house, shared groceries, shared finances, etc. = more cost-effective! but it's not just that...being with somebody who has made the same commitment to you as you have to him opens up a new level of trust--how much more i can test my own limits, pursue wilder dreams, knowing that i have someone who has my back through it all. and yet as much as i love being with him and love being married and hope to one day have kids with him, know that that's not all i aspire to do. i may be at 24 hella young to be a mrs. but i've seen people older than me rush into a marriage thinking once they get that checked off the list, they'll be happy...and they come out the other side of their wedding day still at a loss.
ReplyDeleteyou have to think of it not as a happy ending, but as another chapter. and there's nothing wrong with being single either! stop lookin at what everyone else is doing and figure out what it is you wanna do, and i'm sure you'll find your answer :)
~ rissa
I couldn't have asked for a better response!!!!
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